Just Another Day

So I've been meaning for blog for a while, but timing never felt right. The past few weeks (and maybe even months) I've just really felt that I've had nothing good to say. Not just to share online, but to say to anyone. Family, friends, strangers; anyone. But tonight, I was standing on the balcony of my hotel room in Puerto Vallarta and I just had to start writing.

The letter I wrote isn't something I'm going to share, but I wanted to copy a few lines.

"I’m going to make a really terrible reference right now but bear with me. I was just watching an episode of The Office (don’t judge me) and Michael was really upset that Holly had a new boyfriend (this is season five, mind you) and it got me thinking. How upset is God when we cheat on Him? How upset and heartbroken is the King of Kings when we make choices everyday that dishonor Him? Yet He still loves us. He still unconditionally loves and cares for us, completely. Our every need, desire, ache; everything is taken care of. He promises to lift us up. The love God pours into us is unfathomable to me. It is simply amazing; this amount of grace and love and care. Wow.

Hope, for me, isn’t something lost, but something I live on. Faith. Hope. Love. And that’s the key to life. Living “the life” isn’t about being the wealthiest, the prettiest, the skinniest, the most liked. It’s about having faith in the One True God, hope in His promises, and loving from the place in our heart that God overflowed."

Now this letter, in its entirety, will be read by one person some day in the future I do not know. But I think this part of the message is universal. Disregard the source of my inspiration; God's love for us is blatant. It's plain and true and simple. He loves us no matter what.

I'm reading this book right now called Soul Healing and the author Tammy Smith (who is an awesome lady if I do say so myself) shared something I have found more and more relevant. She shares the idea that every smile, every laugh, every good time we have is God loving on us. He wants to show us how much He loves us! WOW!!! This is crazy!!! It's taken me days just to unpack that tiny paragraph in this 200-something page book. But what a true statement. God is loving on us in all of the ways that we enjoy ourselves. (Now you can't make fun of me for The Office reference!)

On a completely different note,I was just thinking about the sub-heading on my blog. Something about how I'm a fashion student and blah blah blah. I was thinking to myself, "Gosh, I can't wait to change that title. Finally have a career or be a mom or something like that. Something more permanent." But wait a second, there's two things wrong with that thought. Number one, all things are temporary. Life itself is temporary. All of the different "chapters" of life, if you will, are temporary. And that brings me to point number two: all of these different experiences and locations and titles are molding us further and further each day into who God desires for us to become. Think about it, without your experiences as a child, or even as a young adult, you wouldn't be where you are today.

I love the example my friend shared with me once. As you know, I've been blessed to become involved with an on-campus ministry called h2o church. Randomly one day I asked my friend to share with me how he got involved with h2o. He goes on to say that last year he lived in a residence hall and his R.A. happened to be involved in h2o. He became really close with his R.A. and his R.A. invited him to hangouts and services. Then, by God's grace, he got saved! But get this: if he had lived on a different floor of that building, a floor above or below, he would not have had that same experience. God specifically wanted him on that floor of that residence hall because God desired to capture my friend's heart. And honestly, I think God orchestrated that in a beautiful way.

God is using everything about us to advance His kingdom, but He's also using all of our time. Not a second of a day is wasted in God's eyes.

You are making us new God! You make me new.

"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!"

2 Corinthians 5:17

a joyful jubilee

*this post is similar to my previous post with the idea that the stories i share may or may not seem to relate. i have a lot on my heart tonight!*

a lot of my insecurities come from the emphasis i place on relationships. i idolize them and place way too high of a value on what people think of me. my friends aren't just people that i love hanging out with; i have a massive fear of losing them every minute.

i place my friendships on a pedestal. especially my friendships with guys. this, combined with the fact that my ultimate love language is quality time, leads me to develop feelings for people quickly. i have been hurt and i have hurt people because of this. it's so true that hurt people hurt people. and one painful thing i'm learning is that my future spouse is going to be affected by this one day as well.

however, in this very instant, i cannot bear to think about getting into a relationship. [PTL!] i have been praying that i won't feel consumed by the thoughts of dating anymore. and tonight i have had a small taste of what that feels like. oh the freedom!

at h2o, there is a team of people that always prays over the service before it starts. as you can imagine, lots and lots and lots of time, preparation, planning, and rehearsing go into making a service happen. but there's also a TON of prayer. when we close our prayer circle, we always encourage each other to go out and meet someone new. at this, i am always conflicted. part of me says, "yes mabel! go meet new people; be a light!" the other part of me says, "yeah right, i'm just gonna go hangout with my friends." i could feel God telling me that today would be a day of making connections.

today at church, i met a girl from china. her name is freesia. my good friend aggy asked her to join us at h2o today. sometimes i'm insecure about what i say to people when first starting a conversation about faith, but the Lord totally gave me the right words to say. my conversation with freesia turned into one that was super fruitful. we ended up exchanging numbers and she asked me to hangout sometime this week! i am so excited to continue our conversation and dive into her life: i cannot wait to find out more about her culture and her beliefs!

another praise from today actually came from my mother. normally, my family and i do not see eye to eye on the subject of faith. my parents especially stand firm on their opinion that i am way too involved in h2o and that my focus on Jesus and serving is terribly damaging to my academics. however, today i had something important to tell me mother that i was nervous and excited about.

during spring break this year, i have the amazing opportunity to potentially participate in a trip going to amsterdam, the netherlands. mind you, there is an application process and support raising that i still need to go through, but if it's God's will, i will be spending the last week of march 2013 in europe! this trip has a few different missions: serving a church one of our pastors helped to start, learning about the culture, evangelizing in the red light district and a university town, and spending a day just exploring on our own. this involves determining rather quickly if this trip is something i am called to.

after a summer in colorado, my mom still doesn't understand too much about support raising. tonight, i wanted to discuss her opinion on the trip, i figured i should start the conversation now when i'm first getting the information than wait until i've already applied. i have come to a place where i know that it is right to honor my parents by hearing their thoughts and considering them, even if what they share may not be what God desires for me. at first, talking to my mom seemed to be turning into another discussion about my faith. yet surprisingly, it made a 180 turn and my mother was extremely receptive to what i had to say. she is working on trying to understand how support raising works and even apologized for forming her opinion before she was able to comprehend it fully. there are still logistics about the trip that i need to figure out, but i'm so relieved to know that my mom is at least open to the idea of me participating in this trip. this was truly a huge step for her, it brought me to tears. my friend elsa encouraged me with this: "there's no way that any person can change their heart like that without God's work in them." God is definitely working in my mom's heart. now, my biggest concern can be putting my faith in the fact that God can and WILL provide the funds needed for this trip.

this weekend has been a beautiful blessing. i have been able to find joy in my fashion work, practice loving on people (especially people who are sometimes hard to love), and on top of all of that, the temperature was in the 60s for a majority of the time. super enjoyable.
a few words from the songs on my heart tonight:

"Holy is the Lord God almighty, the earth is filled with His glory!"  Holy is the Lord- chris tomlin

"breathe in me your life, i can feel you are close now. i can never hide; you are here and you know me. all i need is you and i love you, i love you, i love you, i love you. breathe in me your life til your love overtakes me. open up my eyes, let me see you more clearly. falling on my knees til i love like you love like you love me, i love you."  bones- hillsong united

random thoughts

*please note before reading that this post is way overdue*

sometimes i wonder how God can be so good to us. specifically to me.

these past couple weeks have been especially hard with lots of schoolwork. sewing, drawing, microeconomics, art history, seven ideas, and history of costume are all very time consuming classes just on their own. put them all together and you get about an hour of sleep a night.
not to mention fashion student organization, fashion shows, hall council, two jobs, h2o hangouts, church and all of the different teams i'm a part of. this semester, mabel is on overload. to an extreme. my planner is about 2 inches thick and on any given day i can have as many as 6 events!

yet, in the midst of all of this organized chaos, i am super joyful. i'm not only finding time for the Lord, but i'm making Him the priority. normally, i'd just say "i don't have time for that" and let it be. but that's not at all the case.

i'm currently going through the book of Acts and wow am i amazed. God is so, so incredible. if you know anything about me, you i am not really much of a history buff. i love art and costume history, but if it's any other class i'm usually sleeping. the lessons that God is teaching me through Acts, however, have me wide awake.

two weekends ago, h2o held their annual fall getaway retreat. both kent and pittsburgh churches were present, and we all had a fantastic time. besides the last night games of ice and basketball, bonfires and intimate conversation with close friends, we were blessed to have amazing teachings! jon shah from h2o ohio state came with 3 jam packed sessions that left us all with more ideas to ponder over than any of us were really prepared for.

his first and last teachings were especially impactful. at first, he opened with the story of martha and mary from luke 10. mary makes the choice to be super attentive to Jesus, so much so that her sister martha is demanding that Jesus ask her to help with the preparations! yet, in the middle of all of the necessary chores, Jesus calmy denies her request. 

"'martha, martha,' the Lord answered, 'you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.'" Luke 10 : 41 - 42

wow. i'm so in shock about what's going on here. and how relevant this is in it's application to my own life! i get so wrapped up in things (even things in the church) that are not Jesus. nothing could ever possibly be great enough to be a substitute for Him.

matthew 13 : 44 - 46 really helps explain the lesson here well:
"the kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field. when a man found it, he did it again, and then in his joy went and sold all he had and bought that field. again the kingdom of heaven is like a merchant looking for fine pearls. when he found one of great value, he went away and sold everything he had and bought it."

my treasure is in Jesus Christ alone! how amazing is our God!

jon's last teaching went over a passage in matthew 14 where Jesus walks on water out to his disciples in a boat. what's really interesting about this passage is that peter, for a short time, walks on the water toward Jesus! unlike most teachings i've heard on this section of scripture, jon didn't highlight what peter did wrong; instead, he advertised peter as a winner!!!

yes, peter lost sight of Jesus and started to sink, but he did walk on the water! how amazingly incredible. when we have those little mustard seeds of faith, we can truly accomplish anything! i could just feel God relaying one message to me so clearly:

Mabel, it's time to step out of the boat.
it's time to take me a faith. it's time to get out of your comfort zone.


on a completely different note, i'm also reading this book called when God writes you love story by eric and leslie ludy. i would recommend this to anyone at any age, single or not. it's definitely a good book for just learning how to love the Lord as your first love, why that's even important, and how to love our counterparts. i know that my relationships with my brothers in Christ tremendously improve when i remember to put into practice what i'm reading. even my relationships with my family have improved.

in this delightful read, the ludy's talk about how your family is like practice for loving your [future] spouse. now that's something i never thought of! all this time, i'm sitting here thinking, "well when i'm married everything will be different" but how can that be true unless i'm working on myself now? if im not practicing tenderness towards my closest family members, those that are hardest to love, how can i ever hope to be a good wife when i'm having a bad day and my patience flies out the window?


God is definitely giving me wake up calls here and there. i'm so excited to continue learning from Him.

a {simple} lesson in humility

this past week seems like a blur. it's one of those times when all of the days run together and you have to think really hard about when you did what. and sometimes i cant even figure it out so i give up and deem it unimportant.

but something really struck me this past thursday at our first life group of the year. i went in with a super hard heart. i didn't like the group before i had even given it a chance.
because of my poor attitude, i let myself get hurt by one of the leaders. this dear friend of mine was my mentor last semester, but this fall, however, she really doesn't have time to meet up every week. she is one of the busiest people i know! when she told me that she had to give our weekly meetings up, i was devastated. i was so broken and felt completely abandoned. all of the staff women are super busy; most of them having multiple children and other women to mentor as well. my friend broke my heart when she told me that she couldn't commit to me this semester.

also because of my bad attitude, i was really angry about the role i was playing in this bible study; i was a mere member! i had wanted to be a small group leader for as long as i can remember. my junior year of high school i went to and had a lot of input in a bible study with 50-60 of the strongest Christians in our whole student impact ministry- a high school group of about 1,300. my senior year of high school i started leading sophomores about once a month. my mom had always told me i was born a leader. why couldn't h2o see that i was ready?

usually, i've found that God will speak to me about areas that i struggle with when i least expect it. thursday, while my life group was meeting, me and God were having our own conversation. it went something like this:

Mabel: God, i really hope you have an escape plan for this.
God: now, why would you want that?
M: you've prepared me for way better than this. and can't you see how the leader is talking? like she's better than me...
G: well do you think you're better than her?
M: ...um...no i guess not. but does she have to say it that way?
G: maybe there's something that you should be taking away from what she's saying.
M: ...
G: and do you think you could honestly handle the responsibility of leading right now?
M: ...
G: you're right that i have prepared you for better. you won't be leading a life group. i have plans for you to be a light in places that only YOU can.

i needed that loving slap in the face. God is way too kind, His grace overflows even in these hard conversations. i don't deserve an answer to the question "why?" God doesn't owe anyone an explanation for what He's doing. but how amazing that He loves me enough to help me through my self-inflicted blindness!

these verses have been helping carry me through the weekend:

"For all those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.” [Matthew 23:12]

"Then King David went in and sat before the Lord, and he said: "Who am I, Lord God, and what is my family, that you have brought me this far?" [1 Chronicles 17:16]

this is so reassuring that God is sovereign! who am i that God brings me out of my suffering? who am i that God sent Jesus for me?! 
God has been teaching me that by putting extreme value and emphasis on my position in a group, i'm only trying to exalt myself. obviously, i'm not the one meant to be glorified. doesn't Jesus warn against this kind of self-righteousness in Matthew 6? "do not be like the hypocrites who do (various acts) in public to be seen by men? i tell you the truth they have received their reward in full." what i truly desire is the reward of my Father in Heaven. talk about a heart-check!

i have an amazing community at h2o with lots of women who love me. i will remain hopeful about finding someone to meet with on a regular basis. and i have learned a lot more about what God meant when He said, "i have plans for you to be a light in places that only you can."
this semester is going to be the busiest time i've ever encountered in my whole life. i will be involved in h2o in other ways than life group leading. i am on atmosphere team, production team, party planning committee, greeting, and mentoring for the well. i am working 2 jobs. one at the admissions call center monday-thursday nights and the other is giving campus tours on fridays. i am going to be involved in the fashion student organization hopefully designing for and photographing fashion shows. i am hoping to get an executive position in my hall council and be involved in planning programs and attending meetings. on top of all this, i'm a fashion student with about 20 hours of studio work necessary outside of class. God is planning to use me to help show his love in these places! let's hope people don't trip over me and my pride..

needless to say, this fall will bring some of the most stressful times i'll ever face. but it will also bring excitement and joy and new adventures!

i want to close with two verses that are particularly on my heart this evening.

"You have searched me, O Lord, and you know me." [Psalm 139:1]

"Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart." [Psalm 37:4]

how amazing that we have a God who love us so much that he desires our own happiness! God knows us and our desires. when we delight in Him, i can't help but think that it helps to align our desires with His plans for us. putting God first in everything and always thinking eternally is something i do not think anyone has mastered, especially not myself. i do things on multiple occasions that are out of selfish ambition. i understand now that i have a long way to go on this road to humbling myself, but i'm very excited to see how God will continue to teach me this discipline!

how blessed.

first blog, not really sure if i'm ready for this!

let's get you all caught up to speed. my name is mabel jean nevel. i am a 19 year old college sophmore studying fashion design. i am super blessed to be going to school in kent, ohio. originally from the chicago area, i love [and know] good food! i am creative, fun-loving, and all my own; with a little dash of crazy. maybe a lot of crazy.
oh, and the most important thing: i love the Lord and am striving with all of my being to be a heart after His heart. [Colossians 3:2]

today, as i sit in the lounge on my dorm floor, i am watching the pouring rain and just thinking about how truly blessed i am. my family, my many friends, my school. even this couch i'm sitting on, the food i have waiting for me in my room, fireworks and rainbows. today is such an amazing day. there's really no explanation for this joy other than the fact that God has definitely placed this in my heart!

i don't know about you, but i always get asked that one question whenever i go back to school: "what did you do this summer?" this time, i really dont know how to answer it!

i spent this past summer in estes park, colorado. i have so many experiences to look back on. 94 college students dedicated themselves to being taught about how to be true leaders for Christ on their campuses. reaching out to international coworkers and making weekly trips to pearl street in boulder. persevering the climb of many mountains, including long's peak with an elevation of 14,259 feet. we sang praises so loud that no one could deny God's presence!

though i still find myself grieving now and again at the close of summer, i am so grateful to take this with me. truly i could never forget anything about this summer. every second was seemingly magical.  i find myself so truly blessed to experience every single moment of those three months.

taking only a quick break [6 days] to see family, i almost immediately left for school. when i arrived in kent, i found myself immediately at a birthday party, a leader's retreat, helping freshmen move in, and finally getting my stuff settled. so many things have happened already at kent state, welcome weekend 2012 was a success!

here at school, i find most of my time outside class going toward h2o. h2o church is an on-campus church for your journey; meaning that no matter where you are spiritually, h2o can be your home. i have definitely found my home with this community, as well as many, many others. it is filled with the friendliest, most welcoming people, amazing worship services, and so much more! many of my favorite memories are because of h2o (:

h2o was one of the only campus organizations that made it a priority to be at every major event offered for new students during welcome weekend and first week of classes. through h2o, i've met so many people in the past two weeks; people who are looking to continue their relationship with Christ in college and students who are a little skeptical and have a lot of questions. it's a great honor to be able to dive into these lives and really get to know these unique individuals. this week has been such a great reminder to remain hopeful for  my friends, peers, and even my family members who do not yet know Jesus. for He has a plan for them! [Acts 16:31]


i'm still sitting here in the lounge, first floor of centennial b. i love looking out the window and seeing what is happening. the rain has stopped and the sun is shining down on kent! through the storm, i will praise Him. because as i praise Him, His mercy and blessings fall on me!

"Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you." - Luke 6:38