short but sweet

this post is gonna be simple. as in: i really want to create a post, but don't have a couple extra hours handy to write something seemingly thoughtful and provoking. so here are my thoughts from these last couple weeks:

life gets busy. it's freaking insane how many things you an actually fit into a 7-day schedule. but while you're busy being busy, never forget that life is happening. all around you. in this very instant you're read this, unbelievable things are happening everywhere. don't be too busy to notice. maybe you don't have time to stop and stare or take a picture, but make sure that you absorb the wonders of this earth.
this may sound dull, but even on a bad day there are little things that can brighten any mood. be open and look onto life with positive eyes.

right now, even as i sit at my desk in my dorm, i am amazed by this space. it's a bit cramped, with every square foot overflowing with books and clothes and miscellaneous remnants of old memories, but every single one of these items is a treasure. the arrangement of our room (which i personally think my roommate, maegan, and i did a great job with!), the cluttered knickknacks on my desk, all of the pictures and wall art around our space. this is my little piece of home in kent, and this is me hoping that i remember to cherish all of the moments i have in it!

this is my encouragement to you this week: enjoy life to the fullest. soak in every rich moment: all of them are dripping with joy.

have a blessed week!
~mabel

"rejoice always!"

-the words of Paul: Philippians 4:4, 1 Thessalonians 5:16

a peaceful car ride

these are my thoughts from my car ride yesterday to kent! i had such a fun time with God, singing along to my radio of just praying in silence. six hours is quite a bit of time to just think and reflect, but i'm just blessed to have spent it with my best friend (: this is a humble lesson i was pondering that i recorded on my phone. (minimal editing done)

“thinking about how our faith makes us righteous (back in Romans 4 and Genesis 15) and how our faith is what saves us. it’s an idea that almost proves itself: we read in Ephesians 2:8-9 and in Titus 3:5 it is by grace that we have been saved, through faith. our acts cannot save us. a majority of the time we’re doing things that are not giving glory to God. our nature is to be a sinner. our nature is sinful. we’re rebelling against God constantly. that’s why we cannot do anything big enough to save us. Jesus, and our belief in the fact that Jesus died for us, is ultimately what saves us. and i think about “why can’t i save myself? why do i have to rely on him?” referring back to the nature of human beings, Jesus was there in the beginning. Jesus was there in the garden with adam and eve. Jesus was already in the plan. in the beginning of the world, god said let us do this and let us make this. He’s talking to the trinity. He’s referring back to his council; the Holy Spirit and Jesus, “let us make man in our image.” it’s the image of God, but it’s also the image of the trinity. it’s holy and perfect. it’s beautiful. but our nature was always to be sinful. and that’s why Jesus was there in the beginning, God knew what was going to have to happen. God knew in the beginning of the world that we were going to need something to save us and bring us back to Him.

back to why our acts cannot do that, it is because we are not Jesus. we cannot be our own god, we cannot be our own savior. i think back to one of my favorite songs: part of the chorus goes “the worst of me is written in stone (its permanent, stays forever), but the best of me is written in water.” if you write something in water, make even a ripple, it goes away instantly. it’s there for less than a second. the best of us is changing all the time. we can think were doing so good as a Christian and growing so close to the Lord, but, no.  we’re not gonna be there. until we die and get to heaven and actually receive that from God we are not there. we are not home yet by any means. our best day here on earth is still not home. we’re not there yet. we can think that were having the best time, but this is not the best. the best is yet to come. the best is yet to come! how amazing is that, that we have a promise like this! that when we die and go to the Father it will be better than we can imagine. we get to be with our Lord, our Savior, our Father in heaven.

that’s what i wanna leave ya’ll with. might be a little bit of a rant, but i need the constant reminder than my acts are not what saves me. i will always fall short of the glory of God. and what’s more, i need to forgive myself for what I’ve done. God have forgiven me, wiped my slate clean. if i can’t forgive myself, it makes the forgiveness of the Lord seem lesser than what it really is. if the perfect Creator of the world can forgive what i’ve done, in the past, the present, and the future; i need to move on. i need to stop dwelling in the past, stop getting stuck on my failures, my sins (big and small alike). i need to stop looking back. I’m not fully complete yet. I’m not entirely who God desires me to be, but i am not where i was before. and that is a praise! that is a praise to God for changing my life and making me something different, for taking my heart of stone and transforming it.

i definitely have my tendency to give in to temptation. on this highway for example: i definitely have the temptation to make other drivers angry if they are driving in a way that’s bothersome. but that is not ok. that is not showing them Jesus Christ. that is not what Jesus would do. he would be kind. my job is not to make them angry. my prayer is that my heart would be filled with the fruit of the Spirit.”

a quick parting note: i like to talk out loud in the car because it makes my thoughts more real. they’re definitely more concrete when i can speak them aloud. it’s almost like i can grab onto them. and one thing i love more than anything is being able to pray out loud. after talking about this idea of faith and acts, i continued to pray throughout the last 17 miles of my journey. this particular drive to kent was surely one of my favorites. there will be many more in the future, and i’m continually inspired to sing and shout my praises to God!

the sufficiency of faith

today i'm reflecting on Romans 4. i think this is such an important piece of Scripture to share. i'm realizing so much about my own faith just by reading about the faith of one man. i'd like to invite you to follow along as my post today will be more of a bible study than a weekly update.

this section of Paul's letter to the Romans is sometimes referred to as "the sufficiency of faith". in other words, "faith is enough". just my research on different titles this passage has been given by scholars reminds me of the promise in 2 Corinthians 2:9-10. if our Father's grace is more than enough to cover our past, present, and future sins; our faith in our Father is enough to live on.

i really enjoy how Paul starts off this section of the letter talking about works-based faith (v.2). we know that our faith doesn't come from our own works, but it is a gift of grace (Ephesians 2:8-9). and Paul shows that of Abraham in verse 3, when he quotes Genesis 15:6. in verses 4 & 5 Paul explains further; "now when a man works, his wages are not credited to him as a gift, but as an obligation. however, to the man who does not work but trusts God who justifies the ungodly, his faith is credited as righteousness." this means that applies to all of us.

verses 6-12 talk about who exactly God's blessing is for. Paul quotes David from Psalm 32:1-12. blessing is clearly for those who give themselves fully to the Lord. so is blessing for the circumcised or the uncircumcised? Paul defines circumcision as "a seal of righteousness." let's refer back a few chapters to Romans 2:28-29. Circumcision isn't just an outward act. It represents how we must circumcise our hearts and cut out the parts of us that are evil. God doesn't desire rituals, He desires our full devotion to Him. our full surrender to Him is imperative.
now in verses 13-15 we explore what was promised to Abraham in Genesis 15:1-5. this promise was not God's obligation to Abraham, as if He owed something to a man that He had created. but, rather, this promise was made through Abraham's faith. and this promise of righteousness is guaranteed to all of Abraham's offspring. "he is the father of us all...he is our father in the sight of God, in whom he believed..." (v. 16-17)

this may seem like a lot up to this point, but i truly think that this last paragraph trumps the rest in impact. verse 18 starts off saying that "against all hope, Abraham in hope believed..." stop there. time for a self-check (and some healthy conviction). how many times a day do i doubt? how many times a day do i think that i have enough strength to make it through on my own? who am i kidding? i need to keep my faith and hope strong, just as Abraham did. continuing in verse 19: "without weakening in his faith, he faced the fact that his body was as good as dead—since he was about a hundred years old—and that Sarah’s womb was also dead." right now i have a bum knee and it hurts to walk or ever bend it in the slightest. will i have faith that God can heal my knee? because all of the odds were against Abraham. he was old and his wife couldn't produce children. yet God promised to make him a father of many nations, that he would have offspring of his own. verses 20-21: "yet he did not waver through unbelief regarding the promise of God, but was strengthened in his faith and gave glory to God, being fully persuaded that God had power to do what he had promised." somehow, when all of the odds were against him, his faith GREW! his faith was made stronger and he praised God. he believed 100% in God's words. maybe this wouldn't be immediate (25 years passed before his son Isaac was born) but God did follow through.

verses 23 and 24 cap off the chapter perfectly: "The words “it was credited to him” were written not for him alone, but also for us, to whom God will credit righteousness—for us who believe in him who raised Jesus our Lord from the dead." our belief and faith in Jesus' resurrection is our ticket to righteousness. God, through Jesus, has promised us that we will do even greater things (John 14:12)!

challenge: can you live everyday having complete faith in what our Father in Heaven has promised us? that's my challenge to myself today. will i give God even a fraction of the glory He so deserves today? i'm gonna give it my all, that's for sure.

make sure to find my instagram too! @mabeljean (:

drowning in the ocean of grace

tonight, i am just in awe. i am so immensely grateful for grace. there is a God who loves me so much that He wipes my slate clean. my past sins, my current sins, and my future sins. every single day, He is faithful. wow.

right now, however, i find myself having to do something very difficult for me: analyzing my feelings. this process is excruciatingly painful for me. i'm stuck thinking, "why can't i just throw a smile on a get on with life?" i know that i don't always have to be happy, but it's just easiest. especially as an enthusiast. (see Enneagram Institute for details, type 7! throw them sevens up!) over the past few days, even as i have been surrounded by people, i have just felt super alone. there are so many contributing factors. a big element is that i am simply missing kent. i miss my best friends from school, the people who know me inside and out, and things that are familiar. my one best friend from home has been gone since i got back from our family vacation, so i have been spending a lot of time alone. my family's house doesnt feel like home, more like a very temporary dwelling place where i can idle in between semesters. i am seeing a glimpse of light, though. the good news: i'm finding that the only way to unclutter my mind is sorting through each bit with God. and i am learning a LOT.

a few thoughts from my journal a few days ago:

"In my loneliness, I don’t feel like anyone cares? I have friends who care for me and pray for me and love me through anything (even if I can’t be physically with them). I have a family who display forgiveness and love to me often. And my GOD! My God loves me more and knows me better than anyone ever could. He has the number of the hairs on my head, knows my thoughts before I think them, and He collects my tears.

My heart breaks...because the Lord sees me and I have betrayed Him. I completely abandoned Him. In my time of weakness, I didn't look for the Strength to pull me out; in my darkness I did not look for the Light. My heart breaks because God’s heart breaks. You know the song “Hosanna”? In the bridge, they sing “Break my heart for what breaks yours”. I have prayed that prayer countless times. My heart has been broken for countless things as I've seen the Lord’s heart break for His people. But I've come to realize something. The Lord’s heart breaks because of my sin against Him, yes, but it also breaks for me. My Father in Heaven has a heartache when He sees me heading in a direction that is bad for my heart. His heart doesn't just break for His sake, it breaks for mine. His heart breaks because He cares for me. What?!"

this is such a new concept to me. God isn't just sad because i betrayed Him, God's desire for me is so strong that He doesn't want me to wander into the wrong direction. how selfless is He in His emotions!!! this is so convicting. a great reminder that i am not doing anything for my own gain, but so that my Father in Heaven can be glorified!!!

today, i was able to spend a lot of time with my mom. to be completely honest, when she first asked me to join her, i was really dreading the whole thought. i went with her to walk the mall, then we went for a craft supply run, and after a quick bite to eat, we went to see a movie. as comfortable as i was eating breakfast in front of the tv early this morning, i am so glad i got up and out of my comfort zone. even when i am not feeling up to anything, i sure am seeing the benefits of investing in others. i am so blessed and honored to have the opportunity to spend the day with someone i love so dearly. i cherish my mom and am humbled to know her more deeply after today!

well, there you have it folks. first post of 2013!!! one of my goals is to be able to post more often; i so enjoy it and it really does help in sorting my thoughts. as for new year's resolutions, this is hard. i have so many goals and i'm currently in the process of reevaluating them. my biggest one by far is to seek God in everything and pray for more opportunities to share His amazing love. i'm hoping to figure out the ideal routine where i will have enough time to have QT in the morning and start my day off right!

here’s a few quick updates! some things I’m looking forward to this semester that bring me massive joy and you may consider joining me in praying about!

in the fashion realm, my best friend kate and i have submitted designs and been chosen to create for a huge fashion show in kent this coming march! when we get back to school we are going to start pattern drafting and buying fabric, i am very excited for this! it should be a very fun time! also, i am going to be training for a 5K with some friends from work when i get back, i am immensely excited for that! (i am have only recently started running, don’t judge! Matthew 7:1-2, John 8:3-7) and i think the most exciting update of all is that i will be heading to Amsterdam, The Netherlands for spring break this year! our team of 11 will be heading overseas for 8 days to do some work with a church over there, evangelizing and stirring up spiritual conversation on the streets, and doing some preliminary church planting activity!!! i am so, SO blessed to have been allowed to go on this trip and have recently started my support raising process! if you could pray with me about getting all of my finances in check in preparation for this trip, it would me greatly appreciated!

friends, i thank you for all your patience as i pour out my heart, and i’d love to hear from you as well! if you have a prayer request, i’d love to pray with you! just leave a comment or facebook/tweet/text me! i’m all ears!!

many blessings in this new year!

~mabel