Today was a hard day. Over stressed with hours of studio still left to do, major trips coming up the next two weekends that will eat up a lot of my time to get work done, and some sort of sickness developing in my body. Getting started today was not only a drag, but in the midst of the afternoon, it appeared endless.
Yet, we made it through today. I say "we" because I wasn't alone. I have a lot ahead, but I'm gonna keep looking to Jesus to help me through this.
That's one thing that's been on my heart lately. Jesus. Even though I've been drowning in the depths of my own misery, my own twisted, over thought, complex misery, I can still feel Him. He just wants to hold my heart completely.
This isn't about some crazy Bible reading I've done lately. I have to shamefully admit that I haven't actually cracked the Word open in a few weeks. It's definitely been taking a toll on me. But this is about just a feeling I have being pulled to Jesus. Like a small girl running into her dad's arms, I keep running to him over and over and over again.
It has definitely seemed helpless. I can't justify my sin. I can't do more or try harder or be better. The biggest thing I can do is humbly receive grace over and over and over and realize that there's nothing I can do to repay Jesus for His deeds. When He proclaimed that "It is finished," He didn't mean that my works needed to cover the fine print that he kept hidden. When He said "It is finished," He meant that every drop of His blood would cover every sin I've ever done, every sin I'm committing in the present moment, and every sin I will ever commit for the rest of my days on Earth.
He is our Almighty God; who was, who is, and who is to come. If all of the creatures in Heaven in Revelation 4:8 worship our God ceaselessly, I really don't have any reason not to be grateful to Him every moment of every day.
November, in America at least, is a month usually set aside specifically for gratitude. I know that should be every day of every month, but sometimes it's hard to see the bigger picture past what's directly in front of you. And seeing my friends post their very encouraging blessings everyday has inspired me to start counting my own.
So, folks: My (belated) list of thanksgiving.
01. The first and the most important blessing, Jesus. He is so good to me. Truthfully, I cannot describe how grateful I am that I call Him, Savior.
02. My parents. Not only are they the reason why I'm here (in Italy) today, but they have supported me and encouraged me and pushed me my whole life. They are truly lights in my life. I am so grateful that I have parents who can really help me to not only realize myself and my potential, but to pursue the greatest this world has to offer and never settle for anything less!
03. Genuine friendships. There are so many people I am blessed to call good friends. From late night pick-me-ups to family dinners to car rides and EVERYTHING in between, I have so many amazing memories with people who are incredibly amazing. Kaylea, Sarah, Joe, Isaac, Kate, Cassie, Paige, Sam, Greg, Colin; I love all of you and am so joyful that I have the privilege of holding you close to my heart.
and 04. Coffee. Where would I be without my little mug of happiness? Coffee not only wakes me up but also warms my heart. I love you, coffee. We will never part. <3
And, all in all, that's a little peak inside my heart. It's an emotional jumbled mess, but it's mine. And I like having this space to sort it out. I want to close with a verse that I happened upon today, a verse that I have heard and memorized again and again but sinks in with an entirely new meaning this time. These words give me just a sliver of peace for my weary and restless heart.
Matthew 11:28-30
So, folks: My (belated) list of thanksgiving.
01. The first and the most important blessing, Jesus. He is so good to me. Truthfully, I cannot describe how grateful I am that I call Him, Savior.
02. My parents. Not only are they the reason why I'm here (in Italy) today, but they have supported me and encouraged me and pushed me my whole life. They are truly lights in my life. I am so grateful that I have parents who can really help me to not only realize myself and my potential, but to pursue the greatest this world has to offer and never settle for anything less!
03. Genuine friendships. There are so many people I am blessed to call good friends. From late night pick-me-ups to family dinners to car rides and EVERYTHING in between, I have so many amazing memories with people who are incredibly amazing. Kaylea, Sarah, Joe, Isaac, Kate, Cassie, Paige, Sam, Greg, Colin; I love all of you and am so joyful that I have the privilege of holding you close to my heart.
and 04. Coffee. Where would I be without my little mug of happiness? Coffee not only wakes me up but also warms my heart. I love you, coffee. We will never part. <3
And, all in all, that's a little peak inside my heart. It's an emotional jumbled mess, but it's mine. And I like having this space to sort it out. I want to close with a verse that I happened upon today, a verse that I have heard and memorized again and again but sinks in with an entirely new meaning this time. These words give me just a sliver of peace for my weary and restless heart.
Matthew 11:28-30
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."
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